as school begins, another key pointer for parents and families is the positive end-of-day follow-up, the one about “how was your day?” where kids often say very little, except for “meh” or “okay.”
instead, mclean says reframing the question can help: “tell me something that made you laugh today, what gave you joy? what if you could do something differently tomorrow, what would that be? or is there something you would like to share with the teacher?” if they’re finding something difficult, be supportive with a question like, “we know you’re having trouble with your reading, so what could we be doing to help you with that?”
this type of conversation ends the school-day experience with a positive that they can carry with them to school the following morning.
but what if your kid doesn’t want to go to school at all? she points out that many students with learning disabilities disengage from learning at school, making the claim that it’s boring.
her interpretation of boring is that kids are overwhelmed.
why kids are bored at school
“boring means there’s too much happening all at once. ‘i can’t figure it all out,’ so it’s boring because they haven’t been able to connect with the material. it doesn’t mean they may not understand it. it could be coming at them too fast. they need a longer time to process, and by the time they’ve processed the information, the teacher has gone on to the next item.”
she also highlights memory skills in neurodivergent kids who are trying to keep up. they’re thinking, “okay, i have to remember how to store all this. by the time they’re trying to store all this, the class has moved on and they’ve lost the thread. so generally, it’s more like they’ve lost the thread and not because they’re not paying attention. it just takes so much mental energy to keep in all that material and once you lose the thread, you get bored.”